ARTICLE: How to REALLY Dismantle the Limiting Beliefs That Keep Your Life Small

I’m not good enough. Good things never last. The world is unsafe. If you win, it means I lose. I have to earn what I want. I’m too this. I’m not enough that. Women only want men with money. Men only want the skinny, young things. This disease is incurable. I have to take care of myself because nobody else will. I need a college degree to do what I want. Money doesn’t fall from the sky. I don’t deserve love, happiness, success, etc…

Any of these sound familiar? If you haven’t guessed yet, these are but a few of the limiting beliefs that plague us as human beings. Unrecognized and unchallenged, they define our very life. They become our truth. They become our reality. We inherit beliefs from our parents. We develop beliefs from our experiences. We absorb beliefs from our environments. We are infected by beliefs through our media. Although these beliefs are not necessarily truths, we live our lives as if they were. And whatever is true for you, IS TRUE (for you) because your consciousness creates your reality.

The idea that one must break through limiting beliefs in order to allow greater possibilities is well known among those who pursue personal growth. However, real success in accomplishing this feat still eludes many. This is because true change requires a blend of knowing what to do as well as knowing how to go about it. What follows are the keys to successfully dismantling limiting beliefs so as to open your life to infinite possibilities!

Meet Your Inner Witness
The first step is awareness. In order to start recognizing the beliefs that limit you, you must begin using a very powerful part of your consciousness known as your inner witness. Imagine that there are two parts of you: the you that lives your life and the you that observes you living your life. The observer part of you stands outside of you and notices what you’re doing, how you’re feeling, and what you’re thinking. It will inform you of your limiting beliefs. So, what does the witness look for? A good place to start is to have your inner witness watch for two clues: cause-and-effect-thinking and judgment.

Erroneous Cause-and-Effect-Thinking
Cause-and-effect-thinking will sound like this in your mind: In order to be more prosperous, I must get a better job. In order to have a relationship, I must lose weight. In order to feel freedom, I must get this person out of my life. Whenever we think we know how something should unfold in order to achieve a result, we may be caught in a limiting belief. It all depends on whether you live life from the limited personality level or from the broader soul perspective. The personality level sees the world only through the five human senses. The soul perspective understands that the Universe can provide in ways we may have never imagined.

Good/Bad Judgments
To judge something is to name it. As soon as we observe something and give it a name, we have judged it. And because we are infinitely powerful creators, the way we judge something is the way we will experience it. When we call something good, we will experience it as good. When we call something bad we experience it as bad. When your inner witness catches you judging something as good or bad, explore the judgment to see if there is a limiting belief there.

Transforming Your Limiting Beliefs
Once you begin to recognize your limiting beliefs, then you can begin to transform them by practicing any number of belief-altering techniques. However, it takes more than technique to transform your beliefs. To successfully expand your consciousness you must embrace the growth opportunity as a discipline. If you think that you can break through deeply ingrained beliefs, societal paradigms or long-practiced bad habits by sporadically dabbling in self-actualization exercises, you’ll be disappointed. A long-term commitment that incorporates daily practice is the only thing that will steadily guide and direct your awareness toward greater possibility. The following guidelines will help you set yourself up for success.

Cultivate the Right Attitude
Maintaining an open mind and an attitude of willingness is essential to releasing limiting beliefs. If you find yourself succumbing to the voices of impossibility, doubt and skepticism, that’s a sign that your mind is closing and your limited perspective is winning. A good vaccine that wards off the mind-closing virus is to keep asking yourself, “what if...?” What if there was a way to do what I love without a college degree? What if there was a woman out there who could love me exactly as I am? What if there was a way for me to change careers without causing my family financial hardship? When you ask questions of possibility, the Universe answers.

Fill Your Bag of Tricks
In addition to nurturing open-mindedness and willingness, an experimental mind-set is most productive. When it comes to transforming limiting beliefs there are many tools and techniques that work. However, what works for one person, might not work for another. And what works for you one day, might not work for you another day. So, the best approach is to fill your bag of tricks. Affirmations, coaching, mentoring, 'acting as if', prayer, meditation, energy healing, journal writing, study, contemplation, visualization, and counseling are among the plethora of belief-altering methods available. With discipline as your foundation and the willingness to experiment, you will find the tools that will work for you over the long-haul journey of expanding your consciousness.

Accept the Fact That Self-Sabotage Happens
Left to our own devices, many of us will default to our old ways. It’s natural. It’s to be expected. So, rather than letting this natural human tendency defeat you, understand it. Accept it. And put in place the safety net that will catch you when you fall. If you know that your motivation tends to fizzle into nothingness, or that it doesn’t take much for your mind to plummet toward scarcity and negativity, make a commitment that will keep you accountable, forward moving and exposed to new information. Sign up for a class. Pay for six months of coaching in advance. Create or find a support group. Volunteer or find employment where you’ll work closely with people who exemplify the expansion you desire.

Dismantling the limiting beliefs that keep your life small is not only possible, but with the right mind-set and life structure in place, it is inevitable. And, as many a self-help guru has taught, you will discover that when you change your mind, you do indeed change your life.

MUSING: To Bitch or Not To Bitch - That IS the Question...

“What the --!” An explosive "POP" followed by a burning smell compelled me to pull over to the side of the road.

Perfect… just perfect, I groaned mentally. I could feel a victimy complaint list swelling in my mind, barreling down on what had been a zen-like state of consciousness. The desire to plunge into the delicious depths of a self-righteous bitch session (with me, myself, and I) swelled as I got out of my car to investigate.

Nope, no flat tire. But now what? I didn’t feel safe to drive. The last thing I needed was to become a vaporized mist in a pyrotechnic auto event. Probably not a good idea to risk driving.

So, I began going through the requisite motions. Called my hubby, couldn’t reach him. Called AAA. Called my mom. Called the rental car company. Started coordinating the details of my rescue amidst twenty dropped calls due to bad cell phone reception, and fifteen or so friendly Samaritans asking if I was okay.

What a DRAG! This was my first real day-off in a month. Just 60 seconds ago, I was in a wonderfully grateful, peaceful place. Aaaaahhhh, finally everyone’s schedule was set – kids, mine, childcare, summer vacation had started, the sun was finally shining. And BAM! I’m by the side of the road dealing with yet another of life’s inconveniences! This was the cherry on my Sundae of the past month! GRRRRR.

And yet, I’m a self-proclaimed metaphysician. I KNOW that I can’t afford to indulge in a bitch session without risking creating more of the same crap. I know too well how we create our experience and our reality. So, I fought my desire to delve into drama. Took some deep breaths and started my self-talk routine. Sonia, Source is good ALL the time. Be grateful. You’re in a safe place. You have a cell-phone. You have AAA. It could be worse. Your surroundings are beautiful. There’s no place you have to be. The kids are taken care of….”

On and on I tried to focus on the positive. I tried to “get happy.” But I just wasn’t in the mood to be happy. So, I didn’t bitch, but I didn’t get happy either. Then I remembered, Sonia, you don’t have to be happy, just suspend judgment. …BIG SIGH… Okay, that I can do. So, I “practiced pause”. I paused. Took a breath and declared to myself, This is only bad if I call it bad. I am suspending judgment of this situation. It is what it is and it is fine.

The desire to bitch released and I surrendered to the situation. Long story short, two hours later, my car was off to the dealership. The groceries were in my mother’s car along with me, and I was on my way to the rental car company.

The event resolved itself, but more importantly by choosing not to bitch and suspending judgment, some magical things happened. They happened because I knew there was something better than what I would have created by indulging in a go-nowhere bitch session.

Well, to start, after Good Samaritan #12 stopped by, a tearful wave of appreciation swept over me. It really hit me how there is help all around all the time. Stranger after stranger stopped to offer help and care – from the 4-wheelin’ teenagers, to biker dudes in tattoos, to mother and daughter teams, to lone truck men, to single business women. All types, all kinds, all just stopping to help. What a moving reality when you really let it in.

Then at the car rental place, the woman helping me asked, “What was that other business I heard about on your voicemail?” “Oh, that’s Success for the Soul - my private practice. I’m a life coach and counselor.” “Wow!” Her eyes lit up. “I NEED a life coach. Tell me more.” We chatted for a while and she shared that her life was in transition and her eldest son was going to Iraq. She was interested in gaining clarity and guidance for her life.

In less than two hours I had gone from a pain-in-the-neck agitation to an intimate connection with a soul whose child was going to war. Geez! My mere annoyance was certainly worth this sacred moment, wouldn’t you say?

I drove home reflecting on the choice I had had. To bitch or not to bitch, that WAS the question. In a moment when life gave me a situation I really did not care for, I had a choice. We always have a choice. We are always free - not necessarily to change the conditions of life at any given moment, but to choose how we will perceive an event. We are free to choose our attitude. We are free to choose how we will judge an event. And in so doing, we do, indeed, choose our reality.

Choose Your Reality!

Sonia

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ARTICLE: Challenge Your Wounds

A teacher once told me, "Your greatest wound is your greatest blessing." Boy, did that turn out to be true! And it can be true for you if you choose to use your wounds for growth rather than let them victimize you.

For the sake of simplicity, I define a wound as anything that makes you feel powerless. Wounds are made up of traumas and associated limiting beliefs and fears. We remain victims to our wounds when we do not challenge them and when we are unwilling to believe that things can be different. If, however, you confront your wounds and say, I'm willing to know my wholeness - then you've begun to take your power back.

Recently, one of my recurring wounds reared its lovely head to push me toward more growth. In the span of five days, three different sources invaded my "peace-bubble" with the message: We live in a scary world where children are abducted and molested on a regular basis. You'd better do something about it! In their attempt to help, these people succeeded only in awakening fear and powerlessness within me.

I knew that there was a greater truth based in love and peace, and if I did not access it, I was destined to pass the wound on to my children. Fear had its grip on me and the only thing to do was face it, challenge it, and re-connect with my truth on the subject. So, I owned the fear, contemplated it, talked to my husband about it, and meditated. The fear released and I had reclaimed my power. Sometimes we can transform our wounds on our own. Many times we need help. A good counselor, healer, or teacher can help you reconnect with your wholeness.

If you truly want to activate your infinite creative power, you must be willing to challenge your wounds. Consciousness creates! As we transform fear, dismantle limiting beliefs, and remember higher truth, we expand our consciousness to allow greater good into our lives.

Choose Your Reality!

Sonia

For more FREE articles and resources check go to: www.SuccessForTheSoul.com